And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? ~Mark 8:36

This might be my final post on the Common Ground postmortem.  As you know, we are destined to repeat our mistakes, if we don’t learn from them.  Much has happened in the three years since we left Colorado Springs, Common Ground – and our dear friends there – we had something great going, but then it imploded.  I can’t let go until I can figure out why.  I believe I’ve narrowed it down to one key area:  It’s my fault.

‎”Success is going from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.” –Winston Churchill

Yeah, I’d like to pass the buck, but someone once told me that the “speed of the leader, determines the speed of the church.”  There are factors that affected my leadership, there are factors that affected the launch, growth, and decline of Common Ground.  But ultimately, I’ve realized that I made a huge mistake.  Here’s what I see:

• We were given five years to start, grow, and be successful.
• Success was never clearly defined.
• Over time, we discovered that success meant a certain dollar amount – $265k/year in tithe income.
• We were told that we were different and would not be judged like “regular,” traditional churches.
• By non-traditional standards, Common Ground was hugely successful.
• By traditional standards, we were unsuccessful.

Up until this point, I would summarize the demise of Common Ground like this:

1. We never had the support of the local churches.
2. We had tremendous financial support from the denomination, but the political support was divided over many fronts.
3. We needed more than five years.

But all of the above are just circumstances.  Circumstances are to be understood, dealt with, and overcome.  Unfortunately, we never really found a way past these issues.  I dealt with this in stages:

1. Grief – I was overcome with sadness in having to leave Common Ground and our special friends there.
2. Anger – I was angry at my overseers, angry at my team, angry with the denomination, and angry at myself.  And if I were to be totally honest, ultimately, I was angry at God.
3. Depression – yes, very depressed that it didn’t work out.  This coupled with burn-out, loneliness, and the stress of a move, made for a very hard year following our departure from Common Ground.
4. Bargaining – through displaced focus, I tried to transfer my hopes, dreams, and vision for Common Ground onto our new church.  But of course, they weren’t ready for that.
5. Acceptance – I now accept that the Common Ground experiment failed – it wasn’t a good fit for the traditional Church, and the unchurched were still to un-trusting of anything that looks like a church.  I also accept that I’m not a good fit for the traditional church either.

As I accept the failure of Common Ground, and my own failure as an Adventist pastor, I am able to dream even bigger visions of the future.  I don’t believe the vision for Common Ground was wrong.  In fact, more than ever, I am inspired by the things we did right – despite the things we did wrong.

‎”Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.” –Dr. Seuss

The first two-plus years at Common Ground were awesome.  It was organic, it was real, and it was relevant – and then we I began to focus on growth.  My motives for focusing on growth were pure – I wanted Common Ground to survive.  I also wanted more people to experience the Truth that is Jesus, within the context of a community of love.  However, wanting a home run, and focusing on a home run are two separate things.  Those that focus on home runs usually strike out, those that keep their eyes on the ball, often hit home runs.  I took my eye off the ball, and I struck out.

Our vision was to be a R.A.R.E. Community of faith (Real, Authentic, Relevant, and Experiential) – but instead of leading the way towards this goal, I began to push my leaders with the idea that if we don’t grow, we would die.  That became a self-fulfilling prophesy.  I took my eyes off the the goal, and began to focus on the consequences.  Instead of leading my team forward, I began trying to push them away from the precipice.

Pushing is Not Leading

I would love to start over.  I would love to duplicate the first two years of Common Ground – the organic part.

The first six months or so were scary.  We didn’t know if anyone would show up.  Our first small group was very tentative – and I wasn’t sure exactly which way to go.  As we moved forward, we sought to experience God, seek to discover where He was already working, and then to join Him.  At the end of 18 months, we had a plan, we had a direction, and we were building momentum.

Preparing for the Grand Opening generated a lot of excitement and enthusiasm.  It also brought some really cool people into our ranks.  The Grand Opening itself was a huge success, and it gave us a huge boost.  So, at the end of our first two years, Common Ground had taken flight and was soaring.  We had several small groups, 60-80 people were actively involved, and we began to make plans to grow.

Our first evangelistic event was a big  success also, several of those who chose to join us, became some of our best friends.  But something changed at this point.  I don’t have a complete handle on it – but I do know that our focus changed, and I take responsibility for that.  The “speed of the leader determines the speed of the church.“

The pressure to grow, the pressure to meet denominational expectations (which I still hadn’t figured out yet) – and the pressure to be “successful” – all of this changed our focus.  In the future, I want to repeat the small groups, the Core4 visioning, and the regular worship gatherings – but I would like to give it more time to mature, more time to gel, and more time to let, not force, community to grow.  Christ-centered community is what we wanted, but what we ended up with was just another organization trying to hold our own against the pressures we faced.

The pressure we faced, should have been ignored, but it soon absorbed my attention.  One of the jobs of the leader is to ignore the naysayers, the scary monsters, and the distractions.  Leadership requires laser-sharp focus on the goal.  Next time, I’d like to do it without the pressure to “grow, or die.”  Next time I’d like to do it without the constraints of a overly timid denominational structure.  Next time, I’d like to focus on:

“To gather a group of people who want to experience God, seek where He is already working, and then join Him!”

Apology

Because of the pressure I put on people, some bad stuff happened.  I pushed people to do things before they were ready. I pushed people into areas where they weren’t necessarily gifted.  I pushed people away from me, for the sake of growth.  I was an idiot.

“Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,’ says the LORD Almighty.” ~Zechariah 4:6

Instead of letting God grow, via the Spirit of God, I tried to do it through might and power.  The Lord had a plan to deal with the denomination and the five-year deadline.  None of that was my responsibility – and even if we didn’t succeed (which we didn’t anyway), at least we’d still be intact as a community.  Not necessarily geographically, but at least in Spirit.  I became motivated by fear, not led by vision.

Frank, Chris, Ron, Jennifer, Vicky, Vicki, John, Linda, Jim, Joyce, Skylar, Rene’, Brandi, and dozens of others.  I’m sorry.

Will you forgive me?  Will you forgive me for casting a vision that never materialized?  Will you forgive losing sight of that vision?  Will you forgive me for pushing, not leading?  Will you forgive me for putting the project ahead of our friendship?  I should have prayed more, worried less, and relaxed.  I am sorry.

Our focus was to “get the right people on the bus,” then to unravel the vision, mission, and values of this great experiment we called Common Ground. We started slowly, trying to keep the purity of the DNA. We spent weeks creating a shared list of core values. This team, which had considerable turnover, also produced a comprehensive set of leadership standards.

As the lead pastor, I was consistently given the same advice over and over:

1. Don’t launch too soon.
2. Clearly state your core values.
3. Don’t lower your standards to attract leaders.

Because of our funding process, we were able to postpone the launch until we were ready. The process of developing the core values allowed us to disciple and train leaders – while instilling ownership and setting the tone for vision formulation. However, we all too frequently had to accept people into leadership roles who weren’t quite ready for that responsibility. Several leaders lost their faith over the pressures of leadership and succumbed to moral failures.

Overall, though our vision wasn’t clearly stated – primarily due to the fact that it was so dynamic and under constant development. We knew we were about evangelism and the Matthew 28 Great Commission from Christ. We knew we were about community and the two Great Commandments of love. We knew we wanted to reach a segment of the population that isn’t normally reached by “normal” Seventh-day Adventist evangelism.

Typically, the denomination’s evangelism efforts reach 3-5% of the population. From my perspective, we tend to reach people who have some church background. But we wanted to reach outside of that range, we were focused on reaching a demographic that typically has no church background and is more thoroughly entrenched in the secular culture.

It was our intent to reach the postmodern, secular, yet spiritually seeking individual who would not be attracted by the typical church. This may have been the downfall of our experiment. We target people who weren’t interested in church and we found that it is difficult to build a church on the backs of people who have no idea what it means to be a disciple.

Jesus spent three years, 24/7 with 12 men and was able to raise up an earth-shattering movement of disciples. We had about three years, and less than four hours a week with some of our new congregants. This just isn’t enough time to disciple people who are so entrenched in their own ways.

Despite the fact that this may have been our downfall, I have no doubts that this is the way God was leading us. Although there are times I am tempted to regret taking this path, I actually don’t regret it because I know that’s the way we were being directed.

Thanks for the comments on Common Ground.  It was tough, but we knew that being missionaries to an alternative culture would be that way.  They lied to us however, “they” said this would be the hardest thing we’ve ever done.  It was much harder than that!

I think you are assuming that we focused on felt-needs and seeker services.  That is actually far from the case.  We went into this seeking “to draw a group of people together who wanted to truly experience God and then to seek His will for us and the church.”  We were probably one of the most theologically conservative churches in the NAD.  In order to be in leadership, a person could not participate in any unhealthy practices as prescribed by the Adventist Church (e.g. food, drink, adornment, and other lifestyle issues that are plaguing many of our existing church families); in addition, in order to be in leadership positions at Common Ground, one had to be active in soul winning, faithful in sacrificial tithes and offerings, and seeking regular/daily QT3 (quality, quantity, quiet time) with God.

Although we used non-traditional soul winning methods (cell groups, outdoor/public worship in the park, service/friendship evangelism, etc), we also used traditional public evangelism in cooperation with the other six churches in town – although we were the primary drivers behind this.

Over 50% of our congregation was unchurched, not Christian, or from other denominations.  This provided its own set of unique challenges – especially given that about 1/2 of these folks were actively involved in 12-step recovery programs.

Willow Creek’s model will not work in Adventist churches, and we didn’t even try.  It has never interested me to try someone else’s model.  In fact, Common Ground was unlike any church you’ve ever seen (Adventist or other).  We were a hybrid of what worked, minus what didn’t work, to reach the secular postmodern subculture of young families.  (I could go on about what Willow Creek actually discovered, but that is outside of the scope of this reply)

Too often people assume that church plants are about jewelry, music, and blue jeans – but at Common Ground and The Adventure, it would be unfair to classify these churches in that pack.  Both CG and TA were/are successful, but without adequate funding to staff for the growth achieved, many of the gains are lost.  With 150 in our congregation last Summer, it was time to add additional staff to take people to the next level of discipleship.  For this was our focus.

It was our intent to lower the bar for entry into the church community, while drastically (radically) raising the bar on what it means to be a disciple of Christ.  Simply fulfilling “most” of the 28 fundamentals isn’t even close to what Christ is proposing in a walk that reflects His character.  In fact, those may just be the beginning – something a Laodecian culture has forgotten.

We were teaching our people to fast, to pray (and listen) to a real God, to meditate, to worship (truly, in Spirit and Truth), to read the Bible with discernment and insight, to serve, to be joyful in the Lord, and to trust in the power of the God to transform lives.  Indeed, we saw this taking hold in a small percentage of people.

I have watched too many milquetoast churches circle the drain as their flushed right out of the realm of being real, authentic, relevant, and transparent before the culture they hope to infect with His love.  There was no way I was going to lead a church down that path.  Indeed, many plants and splits are all about meeting “our” needs, or doing church in a way that “I” like.  You are absolutely right about a culture being driven by selfishness!  However, CG was never about that.  Instead, our sole purpose, from the beginning, was about evangelism.

Indeed, there are 50-60 people now baptized because of the direct work of CG.  There were another 20 who were preparing for baptism.  I wonder what the long-term, indirect impact this will have on the area?

I’m not trying to brag, but I am trying to say that God was using us to do some truly amazing things in the Springs.  Unfortunately, not only did we not get additional staff, but we lost the one full-time staff that was there (me) – all because of a lack of funding.  God put us in the midst of an unfamiliar culture to reach people who would never be introduced to Christ in a traditional church.  I’m just thrilled I was used!

Thank for giving me a moment to clarify.

We now have come to realize the following:

1. Five years is not long enough to plant a church targeted towards the deeply entrenched, secular, postmodern seeker.
2. Funding for Adventist church plants should not be determined by pre-defined funding formulae, but by the growth and ROI, independent upon established churches.
3. Church planting pastors should not work without a team.  Planters should follow the biblical model and be sent out in twos.
4. Church planting pastors need closer support and supervision than established church pastors.  Mentoring, coaching, and prayer support are essential.  Clear boundaries and protocols need to be developed.
5. Church planters need to be involved in the establishment of protocols and strategic planning at a much higher level than is now allowed.

Many church plants are started for a number of reasons.  As one friend says, all churches were planted at some point.  In fact, most churches started from a dissatisfaction with the status quo.  Unfortunately it wasn’t a desire to reach lost souls as much as it is a “felt need” to do church a different way.  In my not-so-humble opinion, this builds bad DNA into the church right from the start.  It’s no wonder then that the church isn’t involved in evangelism or service to those outside of the congregation.

Several years ago I heard that our typical evangelistic efforts are only reaching about 4% of the population.  This begs the question, what about the other 96%?  Are they not given an opportunity to experience the abundant life in Christ?

20 years ago, I was one of those 96 percenters.  I had given up on church, but I was looking for God.  There was very little about organized, denominational Christianity that appealed to me.  There was very much about the teachings of Jesus that did.  Unfortunately, there is a large gap between those two.

When we were given the opportunity to start a church from scratch, I already knew who our target was going to be.  Young, urban, postmodern, secular, professionals.  People who had given up on church, but were still looking for God.  Over time, this changed to include not just singles or young marrieds, but young families – because that is who I was becoming:  a used-to-be-young man with a family.

It is often difficult to know where to start.  Do I seek out a bunch of already churched people to build a foundation?  Or, do we go directly to the streets to seek out the unchurched?  As is usually the case, God answered that question for us.  Within four months of our start in Colorado Springs, we had gathered a small group around us.  Only two, besides my wife and I, of the eight were Adventists, two others came from different faiths, and two from a very broken past/present.

We immediately settled into the 12-Step community and began to actively build friendships with those who need God most, but distrust religion with a passion.

After the first year in The Springs, our core leadership consisted of my wife and I, a returning Adventist who recently wasn’t attending church, a 12-Stepper who I had recently baptized, his father who was a retired Air Force General (and an Episcopalian), and a man who had been baptized a few years earlier, but was never discipled.  It was an odd mix, but it worked.

This group developed our core values and the beginnings of our vision.

Common Ground became a place where the disenfranchised felt welcome, but the old-time consumer Adventists did not.

Now, here’s the caveat, we were working with all volunteers (except me), in a hostile environment, with great baggage and social pressure for people to NOT join our team.  But all of my superiors, each of my mentors, and the various coaches we employed, were telling me that I could grow these people into leaders.  If I didn’t, it was mere failure on my part to be a good leader.

So, I read books, listened to my coach, attended seminars and lectures and conferences, and generally sought out all the resources I could muster.  But alas, after five years of hard work, I was not able to turn the tide.

We had been able to attract some hard working people to our team.  They were dedicated to the project, committed to the vision (even when they didn’t always get it), and extremely loyal to me, their leader.  I worked hard to break paradigms and instill values that would enable my core team to be leaders like me.  I pushed, I pulled, I nudged, and I led – all to no avail.

The bottom line is, they didn’t want to be leaders.  They didn’t know how to be leaders.  They were too scared to step into any place of leadership.  Oh they tried.  Their loyalty to me,  coupled with their strong work ethic, made them put in the 110% it takes to push to a new level.  But, like I said, they just didn’t want it bad enough.

Meanwhile, I was getting a lot of heat to shape these folks into leaders.  And like any good dysfunctional co-dependent, I pushed my people to be better leaders.  The more pressure they felt, the more afraid they were to make decisions or screw up.

A few months ago, my brother-in-law, who is a self-made successful CEO of his own enterprise, said something interesting.  He told me he wasn’t interested in scaling.  This isn’t the man I knew seven years ago – the one who wanted to grow big enough to own his own jet.  Nope, this is the married five years, soon to be dad, approaching 40 years old man of new faith.

I asked him about this.  It was quite fascinating to me, because I had come to appreciate similar thinking in my new endeavor.  I’m no longer interested in saving the world and leaving a lasting legacy.  I see now that if I do my job well and focus on the task at hand, the rest of the pieces will fall into place.  If it grows, that’s fine, but if it doesn’t, at least we can have quality.

I can’t make leaders, but I can work with the ones already on my team.  Right now, what I see are a bunch of hard working administrators and doers that are hungry for vision and leadership.  And that’s what I have to offer, realistic vision, and solid leadership.

I was so caught up in pleasing my superiors in the church plant, that I pushed the people I was trying to get to step up.  I pushed so hard that they are no longer in my life.  I ruined friendships to please my superiors.  And even that wasn’t recognized.

Never again will I put tasks above people.

This is my squeaky wheel email.

I remember before I had even moved to [the conference], more than 10 years ago now, we came back to make a presentation to the Executive Committee when it met on the Western Slope.  It would have been April or May of 1998.  I remember you saying (my paraphrase recollection) that you were going to move resources (i.e. pastors) from the areas where no growth was happening to the Front Range where growth was happening.  I remember it well, because that was also my vision for the church.  And when you sat down next to me as someone else got up to talk, I said, “Please don’t ever move away from the RMC.”

I guess I would like some help understanding.  Has that happened?  I could be wrong about this, and I know that pastoral resources have gone down some in the outlying areas, but it feels like it is because of funding issues, not vision of moving to a better area.

I was told by someone during pastors’ meetings, who wished to remain anonymous, that even though I didn’t “deserve,” according to the maintenance-based staffing formula, two pastors, I should still have that pastoral salary.  Here’s the reasons he said why:  No other church in this conference is baptizing the number of people I have been over the last 5 years.  And even though the numbers in the maintenance-based formula don’t add up, it seems like when something happens, we ought to be celebrating that, not punishing that.  And if Team1 is really a priority, we should be helping to make it happen, not hamstringing those churches.

Yesterday I found out from [someone] that [a certain city] has only 8,000 people in the community and the church has only 80 people [attending].  The other church supposedly has 20 and going down.  Although it was probably time for [my associate] to leave [this church family] for his own good and for ours.  I’m talking today about the funding of a salaried position.  [My associate] is only an example of what appears to be a systemic problem in the system.  [He and his wife] are leaving, likely to [another church], and they will be watching over less people there than they were watching over here.  Yet, the [conference] was going to make us fund the entire salary, but they are going to get their entire salary covered by the conference there – in a smaller church, a smaller community. Neither the church, nor the community is growing with the numbers we have here.  I could be wrong, but it appears as if less is more.

I realize there are historical issues to deal with.  I realize there are other extenuating political issues that must be dealt with also.  I also realize that I’m asking for some very tough decisions, or I’m asking you to talk to me and help me understand why this would happen.  I don’t think I understand it right now.

To be fair, you did tell me when we first talked about [him] leaving, that you were going to see if you could find me some money to help hire someone.  I believe that the church will be ready for that by November/December – after they grieve [my associate's] loss, and “new” money comes in.  You have continually reminded us that pastors can only really take care of around 150 or so people.  The Adventure is running at 250 right now.  It seems to me that the momentum loss of losing a pastor could send us backwards very fast.

I am willing to come to the Executive Committee to help them see the inequity of this situation because I realize as you seek to move them to a governance model, this is really not their decision, but yours.  But I realize that they aren’t there right now, either.  So, I am willing to come and present to them the raw numbers – I don’t think you can argue with that, except out of historical and maintenance reasons.  It is my belief, and I could be wrong, that you cannot do what needs to be done in the 21st century with a 19 or 20th century model of maintenance.

WDYT?

We didn’t want to focus on “former” Adventists, or even those who may be considered non-regular attenders.  We didn’t want to focus on those who were currently attending church, but were bored with the music, order of service, or “dress-code.”  We didn’t want to be considered “sheep-stealers” or just be involved in moving the saints from one church to another.

Yet, within Adventism, there didn’t seem to be many church plants that had successfully gone into the unchurched population and built a church of “living stones.”  But, we knew, in our hearts, that if that were our intention it would become our reality.
As we moved into the Springs and began to get settled, we kind of wandered and studied the culture, the community, and the opportunities.  Before the first month was over, we had our first small group.

We had been invited to dinner by seminary friends Robert and Heather.  At this dinner we met Skylar and Jeff.  She was a recently re-baptised Adventist and her husband was a relatively new Christian.  Within 10 minutes of meeting Skylar she asked about the plant and after we explained it, she exclaimed, “I want to be a part of that!”

Skylar and Jeff brought two of their non-Christian friends too.  With that first small group, we began studying Henry Blackaby’s Experiencing God Workbook.  We had chosen the book before Sky and Jeff had invited their friends.  Chris and Kelly were very open to hearing the Gospel.  All four of our new friends were actively involved in the 12-Step fellowship and were relatively new in their sobriety.

About the time we finished the 13 week study in the workbook, Chris asked me if he could be baptised.  In the meantime, we began to make many friends in the Colorado Springs 12-Step community.  Because of Jennifer and my unique histories in battling drugs and alcohol in different ways, we fit in well with this group that is often not reached by Christianity in general, or Adventists.

We baptised Chris in the Summer of 2003 and the majority of people at his baptism were not Adventists and many were not Christians.  It wasn’t long before many of those people were in some form of a small group at Common Ground.  In fact, after the first 13 week semester ended with Skylar, Jeff, Kelly, and Chris, we added another six people to the group.

As the second 13-week small group semester ended, we were able to multiply into four groups; and by the Fall of 2003 we had six small groups operating with a total congregation size of about 50 people – mostly non-Adventists and unchurched.

This was exciting to have a reach so broad into the unchurched community, but now a new challenge was looming on the horizon.  Because of our “rapid” initial growth, we needed to clone Jennifer and I.  We didn’t have enough disciplemakers to go around.  We needed leaders, we needed solid Adventist disciples to lead by example, and we needed solid Adventist members to help us keep the foundation of Adventism in our midst.

Choosing the Experiencing God Workbook principles as our foundational message, was a great victory though.  It provided the direction and vision to create solid spiritual DNA.

I just read your blog, and can’t help but be a bit sad. Lots to learn there, though, so I’m hoping that the process of writing it is therapeutic! Have you shared these thoughts with administrators?

Yes, there is a lot to learn.  It would be good if there were an ongoing process of critiquing church plants and the church planting system.  One of my complaints with the current pastoral role is the lack of accountability in the system.  A bona fide system of annual performance reviews, goals, and objectives could greatly increase the effectiveness of the position.  At a minimum, even if we don’t hold the pastor’s feet to the fire, we could at least survey and critique individual churches.

What I have begun to do here is to document our successes and failures – the church, the leaders, the systems, and the various administrative functions of the denomination.  I’ve not shared this with them at this point, because I want some feedback from my friends first.  There are some significant failures in our current church planting systems, but I don’t want to be so pointed at those that I don’t take personal responsibility for my own failures first.

So, what’s going to be different about your current role? What have you learned that you will apply to the present? Are you enjoying your new churches?

The chief differences in my approach to pastoral leadership now are subtle, yet significant.  Now, more than ever, am I putting family before my occupation.  This has come about for a couple of reasons.  First, it is the right thing to do and I should have done a better job in the past.  Second, I’ve learned that no matter how motivated I am, I can never go faster than the lid of the organization that employs me.  Basically, this is the Serenity Prayer personified.

The new churches are challenging because of their traditional, yet liberal paradigm.  It takes time to build trust in a rural and traditional congregation.  I know that I’m going to have to be patient and wait for the right timing and that is a challenge for me.  In the meantime, because the process of moving these churches forward is slower than what I experienced in a plant, it allows me to spend more time with my family and readjust my workaholic habits.

I read your thoughts on the “success” of Common Ground. I appreciate the honest words and know that the emotional weight of a history of ministry that seems unsuccessful is pretty heavy. For what its worth, just knowing there are people out there who understand how difficult this church planting thing can be, means so much.

I believe we have grieved significantly for the losses at Common Ground.  Hardly a week goes by that we don’t hear of the demise of another former member into the abyss of worldly wandering.  The months of August and September were very hard, finding out that we were leaving and having to find a new position, a place to live, and give birth to our son – all that was difficult.

At this point, we are able to step back and take hard, honest looks at ourselves and the system that caused Common Ground to fail.  A year and a half to two years ago, Common Ground was one of the most successful church plants in the NAD – probably in the top 10 somewhere and quite possibly in the top 5.  But now, if I were there, I’d pull the plug.

It is clearly the hardest thing we’ve ever done.  We know that God used us.  But we also know that the denomination, AND the culture, were not ready for a church like Common Ground.  We were too experimental for the denomination and too traditional for the culture.  I believe we were about 10 years ahead of our time.

If we could have realized the funding to keep going, I do believe we could have acheived a financially sustainable attendnance and income.  However, we believe that five years is not enough time to raise up an experimentally evangelistic church within Adventism.

This was an excellent and honest (vulnerable) blog. Thanks for writing it. I’d love to share this with the group I’m training to become church planters if you don’t mind.

I agree with all your three points (accept the need for a mother church in point 3). After starting 4 plants I too have learned these lessons the hard way. Maybe your message here will save others from the same burn-out and help them achieve far greater personal & professional success.

Thanks for the feedback.  I also appreciate that this comment was also posted so others could see it, on the blog, in the comments.  Feel free to share it with your interns – or anyone else you think would benefit.

Steve, in the most recent post I don’t clarify the “mother church” statement.  But in another post I talk about not having an openly hostile, or antagonistic mother church.  Colorado Springs was in upheaval when we arrived and we didn’t even know it.  Shortly before our scheduled launch the primary church in the Springs went through a nasty and bitter split.

We were wondering why we were having so much trouble attracting visionary, evangelistic Adventists to our startup.  Once the split occurred we saw why.  They were all marshaling their forces to do battle with each other.  The very people that would have been an asset to the success of Common Ground, chose instead to follow their bitter friends to start a church focused more on style than vision.  It was really hard to watch when that split imploded and the people we thought could have been an asset to Common Ground, stopped being Adventists altogether.

I don’t believe it is necessary to have a mother church.  I don’t even think a plant needs the assistance or cooperation of area churches.  But for a community the size of Colorado Springs, with only 500k people and one numerically strong church.  The kind of controversy we witnessed really hampered our ability to gather some disciplemakers together.  Indeed, in the last few months, that church has undergone another split and the split has split.  <sigh>

Thanks for including me on your Common Ground reflections. I think you are a little hard on yourself at times, but if you are doing some hard self-inventory and reflection stuff, I think what you are pulling together is pretty amazing. I’m impressed. We all can glean from your learnings and insights. I know God would have to perform a miracle in order for me to even attempt something like Common Ground. I think you have plenty to feel affirmed about in that whole experience.

Are you able in your present situation to reach out to similar unchurched people now? If so, maybe your present situation will still allow you to fulfill some of the dreams of Common Ground.

We do feel affirmed.  We know that we fought a good fight.  We’re no longer discouraged and I don’t think I am being too hard on myself.  I just want to take a realistic view of the successes and failures.  I don’t think it is fair to point to some system and leadership mistakes if I’m not willing to point at myself in the mirror also.

Yes, we learned a lot about reaching unchurched people.  Even while practicing our craft as church planters, I became aware at how ignorant most pastors, and in turn their churches, are at reaching the unreached.  Our vocabulary, our cliches, our traditions, and much of our closed community actions do great damage to our ability to reach out into our communities.  It is amazing how far verbiage alterations, dress styles, and humility will open doors for shared conversations.

As we develop relationships and wait for permission to speak into people’s lives, they will let us and actively, and enthusiastically participate in the working out of their own salvation (and ours in the process)!

Working in a traditional church, it will take years before I am able to introduce some of these pardigm shifts to the congregations here.  Our goal is to stay here until retirement and to lead these congregations across the thresholds of misunderstanding so that they too can crash against the gates of Hell to save lost souls.

You know, I’m sure they *tried* to tell you how hard it was going to be, but who can believe it in the face of eternal optimism?

Yes, they tried, you’re right.  But in my family, we take the approach that we can do anything possible.  the impossible will just take a bit longer to accomplish.  Had we the money to continue, I believe we would be at that survivable mark in the next 3-5 years.  I had said that if the funding dries up, or the leadership changed, we would find a way to tough it out.

However, with the growth of our family, we decided to put our energy towards these two beautiful kids instead.

Excellent point that the institutional church manages to keep *miniscule* churches open. Of course, if they closed those churches in order to use our (limited) resources elsewhere, they’d be accused of playing politics.

One of the things I continue to wrestle with is the lack of leadership in this area.  I have never been dependent upon my current employment in such a way that I was afraid to do the right thing.  I keep saying, “If this pastoring thing doesn’t work out, I can always go run a backhoe somewhere.”

In my opinion, we need two things: 1) Church leaders who are willing to have one-term presidencies; 2) Church leaders who are willing to turn the reins over to younger leaders.

Most Fortune 500 companies are managed by their senior VPs, who are in their late 30s and early 40s.  Our church barely lets someone on the church board at that young age.  Lyle Schaller has said that if you are past the age of 35, you’re too old to affect change in the church.  I think more of our people need to understand this principle.

This is also another reason I’ve chosen to step back from the front lines and pour my energy into my kids.  I will prepare them to stand on my shoulders and change the world.  I’ve done enough world-changing for two lifetimes.  If I were in my 20s or 30s, I would not hesitate to give it another shot – maybe.  Going back to my earlier comment, I don’t think the culture or the church are ready for what we were trying to do at Common Ground.

It’s good to try to figure out what you’d do differently. Are you able to use those lessons where you are now?

Yes, see above.  I think I even have a couple of books inside of me – this is the beginnings of one of those.

_____________________________________

Thank you everyone for the great comments!  I’m looking for additional feedback as to tone/style before I pass this on to my overseers.  Have I been too harsh on them, not harsh enough?  Too real, not real enough?  Have I taken enough ownership for my own shortcomings?

I appreciate your help!

Bill Hybels has said that one cannot plant a church and remain balanced.  Ron Gladden has often repeated that phrase.  I wanted to prove them wrong.  Unfortunately, because of much of my background and personality, I was unable to do that.  I became quite unbalanced during the five years we were planting.  I believe this helped to create our lack of true success in our plant.

Zechariah 4:6 NLT  “This is what the LORD says… It is not by force nor by strength, but by my Spirit, says the LORD Almighty.”

Intellectually, we knew that it was prayer and more prayer that would ensure the success of this plant in Colorado Springs, but once one really gets into the accelerated growth curve of planting, it is easy to start pushing with all of our might and strength.  I confess that the details of administrivia and building relationships began to consume my time.

Coming from an unbalanced background, with an addictive personality, I now know that I needed to be more careful to avoid the pitfalls of devoting too much time to planting, and not enough time to QT3 (quantity, quiet, quality time) with God and my family.

It wasn’t until my daughter was born in January of 2005 that I realized how much of a workaholic I am.  But by that time I was knee-deep into the weeds of planting and didn’t know how to make changes.  Now, I don’t have good role models to follow, but the ownership was still on me to make changes.

It was also about this time that I lost my mentor and supervisor, Ron Gladden, to some internal church political battles.  In fact, the entire Church Planting Center was shut down and it left many plants and planters adrift in a sea of confusion.  Still, though, the ownership of balance was upon my own shoulders and I kept allowing myself to push too hard – all at the sacrifice of my family.

During this time, we continued to see great and explosive growth.  Our small groups multiplied like brush fires on a Southern California hillside.  Our contact and reach into the unchurched community was like nothing I’d ever seen before, within Adventism.  All this success becomes quite heady.  Like a drug, I wanted more and more.

Although workaholism, and its associated successes, can be viewed with praise from those around us, it is still rooted in unfulfilled needs.  I was, like generations before me, thriving off of the accolades of success.  I wanted more!

In the Fall of 2006 I hit a wall.  I was burned out.  The emotional toll of trying to be a good Dad and a successful church planter had become too heavy for me to carry.  I grew depressed and tired.  I needed a break.  The conference offered to give us a week of R&R in the Rustic Cabin at Glacier View Ranch.  Unfortunately that week ended up only being three nights.  Three great nights, but hardly the week that was promised.

During that time, as I reflected on the past few years and the future that lay ahead of us, I knew that I had to make some drastic changes.  I committed to my wife and family that I would end the 80 hour work week.  When we returned, I told our leadership team that I was no longer going to put in so many hours.  I asked them to step up and take more responsibility for the fractal they managed.  They willingly agreed.

For my Core4 leadership, this meant that if they didn’t do it, it wouldn’t get done.  For me, it meant that I had to release my grip on this church we had started from scratch.  Jennifer and I, at first, did everything.  We led the groups, led the worship service, recruited leaders, gave Bible studies, et cetera.  We did it all.  But as our leadership grew, we were able to let go and let them take over certain responsibilities.

Often, for me, “The Perfectionist,” it was hard to let go.  But this phase of burnout was forcing my hand.

During the same time, my superiors at the conference were urging pushing me to turn my core leadership into true leaders.  Its not that I’d not been trying to do that for a few years, but none of us were seeing fruit in that process. (I now know that those people didn’t want to be leaders)  This burnout phase gave us an opportunity for the Core4 to step up and lead.

After a few months of me taking more of a laid back approach and creating a leadership vacuum, I wasn’t seeing any real victories.  Around the Spring of 2007, I knew that Common Ground was going to fail if we didn’t get serious about the roles of our senior leadership.  It was at this point that I began to push the Core4 to step up and “make it happen!”

My Dad is a very competitive sportsman.  With a little parental support, he could have been a pro baseball player.  My brother and I have learned to play to win.  None of us goes into a game just to have “fun.”  Fun is winning.  I’m the guy that never gives up.  It ain’t over till the fat lady sings.

If it is the bottom of the ninth and we are down by three runs, I am still urging our team to get in the game.  Even if we have two outs and we’ve been playing cruddy, I’m still urging everyone to get in the game.  Don’t give up!  Don’t quit early!  This is the way I approached Common Ground in the Spring of 2007.

We only had a few months before we had to have adequate tithe and attendance to be considered a success.  I was getting the word that there was no such thing as partly successful.  We needed the full $265k annual tithe in order to continue to play in this church planting game.  The mere $140k wasn’t going to do it.

Indeed, though our congregation was around 150 people, the conference appeared to only be counting attendance (100) and membership (45).  Our opportunities for success was beginning to look pretty feeble.  But, I don’t quit until the final out.

As I was seeking to motivate my team; and pointing out the options if we didn’t succeed, it was looking like they were losing heart.  My most influential core leader would usually respond with a desire to wait until September 1, 2007 (our deadline) and see what the conference would do.  I tried to explain that this would not be an option, but I was unsuccessful in my argument.

To try and get my point across to this man, I sent a heavy hitting email.  It was my intention to wake him up to the very real failure that was looming in the future.  I was seeking to knock him lose from his fear of attempting something drastic.  I knew I was taking a risk.  I knew that the email may not be taken well.  But I was getting desperate.

In retrospect I now know that email was a bad choice.  It wrecked my friendship with someone I admire and love.  And, it ended up serving no purpose.

A month later we had a heart-to-heart meeting.  It was a joint meeting with our governing board and Core4 leadership.  During that meeting we asked the leadership if they were willing to follow me?  For the most part everyone expressed love and appreciation for me and my family, but it was clear that they had lost confidence in my ability to lead.  Afterward, I sat down with my board chair and said, “I’m done.”

With that, we began to make preparations to leave Common Ground and to move onto another leadership position.

Here’s what I learned:

1. Stay balanced.  Don’t sacrifice your health or your family for the cause.  Play to win.  Play to succeed.  But keep the priorities straight.  God, Family, then Career.  Win with God first.  Win with your family next.  And then, finally, win with the task before you.
2. People before tasks. This is a lesson I’ve tried to learn before, but apparently haven’t learned well enough.  100 years from now, will anyone remember what happened at Common Ground?  Probably not.  But the relationships will last into eternity.
3. Don’t plant without the infrastructure. My brother tried to dissuade me planting as a lone planter, but I was unwilling to wait for that to happen.  I had two planting offers on the table and I wanted out of the small, conservative, rural church we were in.  The lack of one or two other planters to join me; the lack of sufficient denominational support; and the lack of regional support from a solid Mother Church.  All of these contributed to our failure.

The bottom line though and the only thing I have control over is my ability to lead.  Spiritually, socially, emotionally, and relationally.  I needed to lead by putting God first, always.  I needed to lead by putting my family’s needs above the church’s, always.  And, I needed to lead by putting the members of the church above the success of the plant.  I failed in each of these regards.

I don’t believe that five years is a sufficient time line to plant a church with an alternative evangelistic focus.  To plant a church using traditional Adventist public evangelism, I think there is potential to achieve success in five years.  But for the model we were pursuing, I don’t believe that was enough time.  Knowing that now, I’m not so sure I would have entered into a five year project to do what we felt called to do.

Jesus spent 24/7 with 12 men (and some women) for three and a half years.  I had about 4-5 hours a couple of times a week to spend with 5-10 people.  And!  I’m not Jesus!  It just takes more time to disciple people in our fast-paced, busyness that we call life.

Now, I continue to pray for the relationships that are broken.  I continue to recover from my burnout.  And I continue to pour more and more of my time into my family.  I am hoping that I don’t make some of the same mistakes in the traditional format where I am now working.